So, here I am about to embark on my first ever blog. I’ve read a few bits of advice but to be honest they are written for people who are internet literate and know the difference between a platform or a host, I know nothing about that stuff at all! So, my first blog is going to be about………being a dad, it seems logical given my chosen blog name!
Lets get something straight, whilst this blog/site is about being a dad, it isn’t going to be full of nauseating trash about how enriching and fulfilling it is (and it really is). I’ve decided to go down the alternate route, the one that focuses on the humorous side of fatherhood and family life along with some of the day to day problems that arise from undertaking one of natures momentous tasks of bringing up a brood.
Over the next how ever many weeks or months I will be putting together some blogs on how life in my household, warts and all. Be prepared for subjects including:
- How to referee a testicle kicking competition.
- Kids, who knew it would end up like this?!
- Is it ethical to have a favourite child?
- How to deal with the early morning cheeriness of kids.
- Children’s personalities, what a minefield.
- Why your child can’t live on just spready cheese sandwiches.
- Can you morally hold a grudge against your children?
- How to deal with your friends spamming your social media with their kids.
- How to get your kids to eat reasonably healthy food without them having a clue.
- What to do if your kid catches you practising for another.
- Coping strategies at stressful times including gin and tonic recipes.
- Getting old and how to cope with the experience.
First of all though a brief overview of my experience as a dad. Some people call me mad for having three kids, I respond to this comment by telling people “I can’t help but keep leaving it in” and wait for the social fallout to happen as their face slowly goes from a smarmy smile to a look of embarrassment. All of my kids were planned, my boys are natural and my daughter is adopted. I genuinely wouldn’t change them but occasionally I do wish they were all mutes.
Family life started for us in August 2010 with our first boy and i must admit I got well and truly wrapped up in the spamming of peoples Facebook with my pictures and gushy updates. My eldest is a blonde hair, blue eyed genius of a boy. You want to know a fact about animals/space or how Santa can logistically manufacture and deliver all of the Christmas presents for the worlds children, he’s your kid. Our eldest didn’t walk until he was 16 months and prefers wildlife videos to sport, he is the spitting image of my wife.
In the September of 2012 the second boy turned up and I immediately thought “crap, this ones completely different”. Dark haired, blue eyed still (my genes at work there!), stocky and very physical, we call this boy “the beast” or “cake” after discovering his abilities to consume enormous amounts of the stuff. He is fairly intelligent but definitely sport driven, he was rucking with a rugby ball at 2 and is comfortably as strong as a child twice his age, you want someone sack tapping then he is your kid. He is the spitting image of me.
In 2016 our daughter arrived on our doorstep, quite literally! We adopted our little girl and immediately thought “crap, this ones different”. Now genetics had no part to play in this but our daughter is a spitting image of my wife and myself with beautiful blonde curly hair and blue eyes. She is a bit different to the boys as she has learning difficulties and is a bit of a mixed bag, she will inevitably be living with us for a long time but I don’t mind that. Despite her intellectual issues she is as strong as an ox and can rough it with the boys all day long.
We live in a normal house, have normal jobs and lead a pretty much normal life. We have 2 dogs which is the choice of my lovely wife and like most people we have to put up with everyday issues such as getting shoes on your kids and trying to remove stuck bits of lego without swallowing them. We sometimes socialise and occasionally we stay up past 10pm at night! So there you have it, a brief overview….
oh, and at the time of writing this I am 35 which is a fact that sits uncomfortably with me but more of that later.